Hello my name is Courtenay and its been over one year since I've blogged.

Life is different now and yet the same as it ever was.

before I struggled with one job that tested my moral sense of well being and constant state of panic for 3 or 4 jobs that are more fun but less stable.
Before, I was coming to terms being left alone by someone i had shared 2 very good years of my life with, and now I share my life with someone who is truly supportive and loving although interesting.
before I had a shadow of a life, mostly work and home, now I feel so rich with hobbies and function as well as surprise.
Before I had loose plans to go back to school and now they are more solid.

there are still moments of doubt, like the speeding ticket I refuse to deal with because I don't have the money and I am convinced that our legal system is just fucked up enough to let Paris Hilton have a weeks worth of jail time for her 3rd DUI, and then would incarcerate me for neglecting a speeding ticket 6 months.
Another doubt is in the fat, literally encasing my organs as we speak. I want to lose the weight but i like the art of eating well far more.
Yet another is in the 2 year rub I am steadily approaching with my love. In 6 months or so I will be at the threshold of a new experience, a long steady relationship. I want very badly to make it work and not push away like i always do. But maybe thats what i am a drifter, emotionally speaking, not wanting to get to close in fear that i may be rejected.

Hopefully my blog space will be one more of entertainment and less wah wha wah from here on out.

awesome.